Christmas Eve

 This year Christmas Eve was so relaxed and just perfect.  Chant worked until 12:00 and then we made a "quick" stop at Smith's.  When we got home Chant and the kids made sugar cookies while I read The Forgotten Carols: A Christmas Miracle for Isaac and Eliza.  This is a tradition that is very special to me.  The Forgotten Carols have been a part of my Christmas since Micheal McLean first wrote them and started performing it.  I wanted to be able to share this tradition with my children, but the original book was too long.  I found this version for kids last year and I was thrilled.  While we read it, we listened to the carols and then I asked the kids questions about who was singing and what their song was about.  They get it.  And I love it!  I cried, like I always do, so Brinnley had to read the last page for me.

After dinner we opened our Christmas Eve present.  Jammies, of course!  It was so funny when Brinnley opened hers.  She got a sweatshirt and sweatpants.  There was a sticker on them that says, "NEW and IMPROVED FABRIC." Brinnley read that out loud with a surprised, enthusiastic voice.  It was awesome!    

Monkeys, of course.  And Toy Story.

After getting our jammies on, we all bundled up with blankets and got in the car to drive around and look at lights on houses.  We were in a neighborhood on the Herriman hill just driving slowly looking at houses.  We turned a corner and standing in someone's front lawn were 8 deer just munching on the grass and trees.  We were floored!  We watched them for a while before Chant rolled down the windows.  We were so quiet and we could hear the deer making that weird clicking sound.  After a while we kept driving and 4 more deer were in someone else's yard.  It was crazy!  The kids were so excited we got to see Santa's deer and they wanted to go home so they could get in bed.  They were afraid Santa would skip our house because they weren't in bed.  Such a magical memory.  Kids really do make Christmas!

Zander and the Tree

 This year our family welcomed our own Elf, Zander.  It was so fun for the kids to wake up and see where Zander was.  Some of the favorites places we found him was when he was riding on the duck, sitting in the wreath, and hanging out in the old milk bottle.  We were sad to see him go, but we look forward to seeing him next year.

 It was so fun for us to cut down our own tree again.  The last time we did we were living in Missouri and our tree was covered in Praying Mantises.  I loved having a real tree and the scent of pine.  Last year I got these cute mitten garlands and I love the way they look!  Such a nice change from tinsel.

We love you Zander!

Life

 I feel bad for Porter because I never posted a picture of him at Halloween.  He was the most handsome prince I've ever seen with his make-shift sword and shield. 

We had an awesome Thanksgiving at my parents home, but unfortunately I left the camera at home.  This is Porter's first year with a live tree and he loved tromping through the snow to find the perfect tree to cute down.

 Saturday, December 1st I was at Jenny's house for a sisters' crafting day when Chant called to tell me he had Porter at the ER getting stitches.  He tripped and fell into the corner of our bookcase.  He got 4 1/2 stitches (Dr. counted the double stitch as the half).  I made it back in before he got the stitches, so I was in the room with him holding his hand.  I was shocked because Porter held completely still.  I kid you not, the boy didn't move at all.  His eyes followed the needle as the doctor pulled it up, but that was it.  I was getting a little queasy, but I held my boy's hand and focused on his wrinkly little fingers.  We made it home 45 minutes before the ward Christmas party started.  He wanted to go, so we changed him out of his bloody shirt and off we went.

 I've been a little obsessed lately with hair tutorials.  Finally, I found someone who could explain the waterfall braid to me.  Brinnley is so patient while I watch my videos and then copy what I've seen on her and she is always excited to look in the mirror when I'm done.  She's started to have more of an opinion about her hair and tells me how to do it.  The half waterfall is a new favorite of hers.  I only do it on one side and then finish it off with a normal braid.  I love that she lets me experiment on her.  Ainsley only lets me try new things after I've done it on Brinnley and only if it looks cute.  Love these girls!

I am not alone

Something's been eating at me for a few weeks now.  Three Sundays ago I was asked to share an experience or time in my life when I felt my Savior's love for me in Relief Society.  I was honest and shared two very personal experiences when I knew without a doubt my Savior was with me, carrying me and strengthening me.  But when I sat down I felt an overwhelming sense of sadness.  I had cheated myself and those in the room.  I had shared those same experiences in a talk I gave at Young Women's in Excellence.  Although only three or four people in the room had been in attendance when I had previously shared those experiences, I felt like I had let them down.  I had denied them the opportunity to learn more about me and to let them know that I knew the Savior has touched my live since those experiences have happened.  But I was afraid.  The experience that initially came to mind felt too recent, too raw, too exposing. 

I have been thinking about this a lot, and then I read something on another blog today and this hit me so hard.  Maybe someone else would have benefited from hearing my experience that burned to be told.  Maybe there was someone going through a similar situation that could have related.  Maybe, I would have strengthened a friendship or made a new friendship by letting others see into my soul.  I have been so guarded in the thoughts I express and the way that I interact with others because I am afraid of judgement or being misunderstood.  And the result is I haven't made connections with as many people as I would have liked and those I have made friendships with, I feel I have short-changed.  I'm truly sorry for that, because by not being open myself I may not have allowed others to feel like they could share with me.  Relationships of all kinds require give and take.  I have been happy to take others' stories, but reluctant to give my own.  I didn't want to have this one thing define who I am, but in a way by not talking or letting others see there is more to me, I have let just that happen.  Hopefully I am not the only one who is constantly in need of reevaluating who I am, what my self-worth is.  Or maybe I really am that slow of a learner. 

I still don't quite know my purpose, but I do know this.  I know that my Heavenly Father and my Savior are aware of me.  I have seen miracles in my life, from the seemingly small to the extraordinary and every one of them has softened my heart and reminded me that I am of worth, that I am His daughter and He is aware of me and that my brother and Savior suffered for me, not only for my sins, but for my sorrows as well.  I know that He cries when I cry and His heart hurts when I am hurting.  I feel His love for me.  So even as I struggle with trials I know I am not alone.  And my circle of comfort could be larger, if I would open myself and let others in.  I don't have to carry these burdens on my own.  My Savior helps make the burdens on my back lighter, but that load would be even less if I would let others put their arms around me and help lift me up.  So to those of you who have tried, I thank you for not giving up.  I'm trying to do and be better. 

You Better Not Cry!

Last night we had a wonderful Christmas party at Oma and Opa's house.  Ainsley was so sad to leave and she was crying really hard.  We thought turning on music would help.  It happened to be Justin Bieber's Christmas album.  Porter has that thing memorized.  He was getting really frustrated that Ainsley wouldn't stop crying.  After a couple songs he said, "Turn it to number 4!"  That song is Santa Cluas is Coming to Town.  Porter started singing along and he turned and sang to Ainsley "You better watch out, you better not cry."  But she kept on crying.  Porter, in a very exasperated voice said, "Well that didn't work!"  Chant and I were dying laughing.  Towards the end of the song Ainsley started to calm down and when she finally quit crying Porter threw his fist in the air Rocky Style and said, "Finally!"  Oh he was cracking us up!  Love that little boy!

Pumpkins!

 Ainsley had to bring a pumpkin decorated with a character from her favorite book to school.  Right now her favorite book is "Pete Rocking in My School Shoes."  Chant worked his magic and he was able to draw the cat and his guitar and Ainsley painted it. 

 Porter didn't want his pumpkin "cut" so he painted.  Layer upon layer of different colors that all ended up looking kind of gray with a smear of red.  But he was havin fun.

 Miss Brinn went the traditional route.  She even helped cut it.  First she designed it with a marker and then they carved.

 After Ainsley finished her pumpkin for school, she went to town on her pumpkin from the pumpkin patch.  She only painted too.  Mr. Pumpkin has spots all over it.  I love how it looks like the pumpkin has hands.

And my sweet girl ready to take her "Pete the Cat" to school.  Love this picture! 

My Two Front Teeth

Two teeth in two days, this little lady can now sing "All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth."  Of course Grandpa had to ask if she's been kissing the boys.  She just giggled and said, "Yep, my Daddy!"

Witches and Pumpkins

 Last weekend we took advantage of the good weather and went on a witch hunt at Gardner Village.  There is a list of 15 different witches to find and after finding them all, they get a free cookie.  We are ready to go hunting!

 This was Brinnley's favorite:  a witch talking on her eye phone. 

 Love Porter's cheeser smile.  They had a great time. 

 Next stop was the pumpkin patch.  Brinnley was on the search for a pumpkin that had different colors.  She finally chose one with green.  Porter had to have one he could pick up himself.  Funny boy.  So his is smaller.  But that's what he wanted and he was happy. 

 At the top of the hay stack.

It was an awesome, busy day.

Caramel Apples and Spooky Lunches

 This month has been a lot of fun!  A couple weeks ago we spent Friday night making caramel apples.  We drizzled white and milk chocolate on them then added candies on top.  They were definitely works of art. 

 The kids got invited to a "Spooky Lunch" by their friends, Olivia and Caleb.  Ainsley wanted to be Hannah Montana and Brinnley is Miley Cyrus.  They have the attitude to pull it off for sure.  Love these spunky girls!  Porter's lunch was the next day, so he didn't have his costume on.  But the Little Prince is ready for Halloween.

 

A Good Friend

 Brinnley was awarded the Principal's Pride award this month.  This month's award was for friendship.  That was the perfect thing for Brinnley.  She is a wonderful friend, always caring and concerned about others.  I am so proud of my girl and I love her so much! 

Crazies

 So I'm WAY behind but I thought these pictures were funny so I had to share.  September was crazy hair day at school.  I braided their hair the night before and took it out the next day.  I thought it was pretty awesome looking!

Pencils, Crayons, and Loaded Backpacks

 Monday, the 27th we had our back to school dinner and yearly theme reveal.  That evening I took the girls to get their hair cut, which turned out super cute, and then we came home for our pizza dinner, which the kids chose.  The theme we chose this year is "Be brave!  You can do hard things."  It felt fitting, for all of us.  And it applies to all areas of life, not just school.  We had a long talk about all the ways we can be brave in our lives and what being brave means.  I am so excited for them and the things ahead of them this year. 

 We all signed our names and promised to take every opportunity we can to be brave. 

Brinnley started 2nd grade on the 28th.  I let the girls choose their own outfits this year.  That is one of the few outfits during the year that I have normally chosen, but I let go and let them pick what they wanted. 

 I did talk Brinnley into letting me curl her hair, and it looked beautiful!

 The 28th Ainsley had an appointment to meet her teacher.  She was so excited!  Her teacher seems awesome.  Brinnley really liked her when she worked with her last year, so that made me feel better.  It's going to be an awesome year for this little lady. 

 She is so excited to be a 1st grader!  I was a little nervous about her being gone all day, but she came home smiling.  And then she crashed hard on the couch half an hour later.  All day is going to take some adjustments!

I babysat all day Tuesday and Wednesday, so the first two days of school Porter had someone to keep him company.  But Thursday and Friday it was just Porter and me.  At first I didn't know what we were going to do all day.  But it was really nice.  Thursday he and I laid out on a blanket in the backyard and he played on the I-Pad while I read a book for a while.  It was nice to just be together.  Then Friday we took a walk and a bike ride.  Surprisingly, he didn't ask to watch TV all day.  He played with toys, looked at books, helped me fold clothes.  And we even did some preschool stuff.  This is going to be okay!  We are all going to be okay! 

31 Going on 18

 Chant turned 31 on August 14.  He told me that he still feels 18.  And most people say he still looks it.  Lucky him!  I hope this amazing man knows how much the kids and I appreciate him and how grateful we are for all he does for us!  We love you so much!  Here's to a great year ahead!

One to Remember

 School starts Tuesday, which means summer is almost over.  This has truly been a wonderful summer.  We have done a lot of fun things:  a trip to Bullfrog, two trips to Ashton, a family reunion.  But amid all the fun travels, we have had a pretty amazing summer just being at home.  I have to admit I was nervous what this summer was going to be like, worried that all I would hear are whines of "I'm bored!" or constant fighting.  To my immense relief and delight, that hasn't been the norm.  Of course there have been little tiffs here and there, but I would expect nothing else.  But honestly it hasn't been that bad.  The "I'm bored!" refrain has only graced us with its presence in the last two weeks.  When I heard it the first time, I silently thanked that little phrase for staying away for so long. 

This summer has been filled with bike rides around our house, games of Dead Man on the trampoline.  It's been spiced up with picnics on the porch, camp-outs under the trampoline, and long afternoons of building neighborhoods on the Lego table.  Mornings have been spent watching mom sweat to her exercise video of choice or sometimes even joining in.  Television has been a little diversion in the afternoons when they are hot and tired.  But it's been a treat for them, not a fight to have it turned off. 

This summer holds a special place in my heart.  It's been filled with the sounds of my beautiful children playing prince and rockstar, house and animals, explorers and spies.  (Brinnley is always the Prince; Porter is often the mom; and someone is always Logan, mostly Ainsley, and Maddie, mostly Porter.  If there is a baby, it's Canyun, Riley, or Isaiah.  The animal of choice is whatever was talked about on Wild Kratts that day.  Of late it's been wolves.)  It's been a summer of sweaty heads from bike helmets and Ainsley's favorite blue and purple patchwork hat.  It's been a summer of carefree hair, which honestly we are lucky to brush, and mismatched outfits.  It's been a summer of laughing.  These three have been each others' best friends.  They have looked after each other, played well with each other, loved each other. 

One of my favorite memories with the kids and me would have to be reading The Phantom of the Post Office.  I read it out loud to them in the front yard while the kids weeded my flowers and Canyun ate grass and played with cars.  We read it under the trampoline while lying on our stomachs on a blanket listening to pounding of hammers on nails of the house being built behind us.  We read in snuggled up together on the loveseat.  The kids listened intently for clues and squealed with excitement when they figured out the mystery.  I love sharing my passion for reading with them.  I love seeing them be invested in characters and what will happen to them.

I love you my beautiful children!  I hope it was a good summer for you.  For me, it was a summer I hope never to forget! 

Cousins are the best!

 July 21- 26 we went back to Ashton to spend some time with cousins.  My brother and sister-in-law were lucky enough to go on a cruise and three of their kids came to Grandma and Grandpa's house while they were gone. 

We had so much fun!  Here are all the younger cousins ready for church. 
(Brent, Lily, Brinn, Ainsley, and Porter)

 One day Mom and I took the 5 little kiddos to Upper and Lower Mesa Falls.  We took a few little hikes, climbed some rocks and trees.  You know, exploring. 

 And they happened to come across a huckleberry patch right by the picnic table.  Score!  We all had purple fingers and tongues.

 Lily found this shell and we didn't think anything was inside, but the next thing we know the shell was on the move.  It was actually pretty fascinating watching how it moved. 

 A summertime trip to Ashton would just not be complete without a trip or two to Sand Creek.  We were lucky to have Madison and Logan with us for a few days.  They always make things fun.

 I had to post this picture as proof that Grandpa actually does know how to do dishes, even though it doesn't happen very often.  No more claiming ignorance! 

 Logan's birthday is July 21st and he got a lot of awesome new Lego sets.  He was so good and let the kids play with him.  They had so much fun that after we got back Brinnley used some of her Tooth Fairy and saved birthday money to buy a set of her own. 

 Thank you Logan!

 This was a rare moment when the kids were not playing Legos or outside in the playhouse playing restaurant.  Truly they were outside most of the time.  I was pretty impressed with the patience Ainsley and Brent had to set up all those dominoes. 

Thanks Grandpa and Grandma for a great visit!