Family Christmas

 We made our annual trek to Ashton for Family Christmas from the 28th to the 31st. 

The 28th Easton got his mission call.  He is going to the Oklahoma Tulsa mission.  He leaves February 13th, my birthday.  He is so incredibly excited.  We are thrilled for him.  His mission covers 4 states, one of them being Missouri.  He leaves so soon, but I don't think he would have it any other way. 

Family Christmas always means a house full of people.  This year we had Hunter with us.  We haven't seen him for a while, and the kids loved having him there. 

 Tyler and the girls

Easton and Grandpa

 Brinn and Gavin

Madison and her boyfriend Dan

 We had the kids act out the Christmas Story for us this year.  Maddie was a shepherd. 

My girls were the angels.

 Mary (Lily) on the Donkey's back (Logan).  Chant didn't get his picture, but Easton was kind enough to be out Joseph. 

 Then came presents.  Nail polish brought a big smile to Ainsley.  Maddie made this hat and another one for Brinnley.  She did an incredible job!  And of course Legos were a big hit.

 Porter was super excited about his red shoes and the Lightening McQueen hat.

And Chant got some awesome Operation PJs. 

I think everyone was pretty happy!

Christmas Afternoon

 Christmas afternoon about 1:30 we headed to Gran's house.  We were about 10 minutes from Gran's when Ainsley said, "Mom, I'm gonna puke."  And she did, right then.  It was all over!  Poor Chant, when he opened the door after we pulled over, he was dry heaving because it smelled so bad.  We were all glad we didn't have to go very far before we got to Gran's.  As soon as we got there, we got her cleaned up and she was fine. 

The kids had so much fun playing with their cousin William.  He is so big now! 

 (Ainsley had to hang out in an over-sized t-shirt of Gran's while her clothes were in the washer and dryer.)  All the kids got slippers, which they love!

 William kind of stole the show though.  They played stuffed animals and were so good with him.

We got home about 8:00 and everyone was exhausted and ready for bed!  It was a wonderful day, aside from the two puking incidents.  But the kids were troopers!

Christmas Morning

(T-shirts bracelets that Chant and I made.)

 Christmas was wonderful!  The kids were awake and talking about 5:00 but they didn't come in to get us until 5:30.  I was already awake anyway, so we grabbed the camera and headed downstairs.  First thing was stockings.  The kids had so much fun going through them.  This year Santa brought little tubes of lotions and chapsticks.  The girls loved that.  Porter got a mini Bucky pirate ship.  Poor little man!  He had looked at it before but I had the camera on the video setting so I asked him to show it to me again.  He held it up for me but he face was white and he wasn't saying anything.  I had just turned the camera to Brinnley when in the background we can hear him puking.  It was all over the floor and some got on Brinn's stocking.  I hurried to get it off.  Poor guy!  But after that he was fine and had as much energy as the girls.  

 All the kids got a Lego set.  Porter was excited to finally have his own and not have to share.

 Ainsley got a Little Mermaid doll set and house.  Her Lego set was a dog show kit.

 Porter got a few car carries along with more cars to put on them.  And his longed for present was a Jake and the Never Land Pirates Bucky ship.  He was so excited! 

 Brinnley got the helicopter/jet Legos that she wanted.  And here is the hoped for/squealed about Tin Can Robot.  (This thing was the one present that she has asked for repeatedly for months, but I had no idea where I was going to find a robot.  At Porter's Craft and Frame, that's where.  I squealed when I saw it in their Black Friday ad and Brinnley squealed when she opened it.  SUCCESS!)

Christmas Eve

 This year Christmas Eve was so relaxed and just perfect.  Chant worked until 12:00 and then we made a "quick" stop at Smith's.  When we got home Chant and the kids made sugar cookies while I read The Forgotten Carols: A Christmas Miracle for Isaac and Eliza.  This is a tradition that is very special to me.  The Forgotten Carols have been a part of my Christmas since Micheal McLean first wrote them and started performing it.  I wanted to be able to share this tradition with my children, but the original book was too long.  I found this version for kids last year and I was thrilled.  While we read it, we listened to the carols and then I asked the kids questions about who was singing and what their song was about.  They get it.  And I love it!  I cried, like I always do, so Brinnley had to read the last page for me.

After dinner we opened our Christmas Eve present.  Jammies, of course!  It was so funny when Brinnley opened hers.  She got a sweatshirt and sweatpants.  There was a sticker on them that says, "NEW and IMPROVED FABRIC." Brinnley read that out loud with a surprised, enthusiastic voice.  It was awesome!    

Monkeys, of course.  And Toy Story.

After getting our jammies on, we all bundled up with blankets and got in the car to drive around and look at lights on houses.  We were in a neighborhood on the Herriman hill just driving slowly looking at houses.  We turned a corner and standing in someone's front lawn were 8 deer just munching on the grass and trees.  We were floored!  We watched them for a while before Chant rolled down the windows.  We were so quiet and we could hear the deer making that weird clicking sound.  After a while we kept driving and 4 more deer were in someone else's yard.  It was crazy!  The kids were so excited we got to see Santa's deer and they wanted to go home so they could get in bed.  They were afraid Santa would skip our house because they weren't in bed.  Such a magical memory.  Kids really do make Christmas!

Zander and the Tree

 This year our family welcomed our own Elf, Zander.  It was so fun for the kids to wake up and see where Zander was.  Some of the favorites places we found him was when he was riding on the duck, sitting in the wreath, and hanging out in the old milk bottle.  We were sad to see him go, but we look forward to seeing him next year.

 It was so fun for us to cut down our own tree again.  The last time we did we were living in Missouri and our tree was covered in Praying Mantises.  I loved having a real tree and the scent of pine.  Last year I got these cute mitten garlands and I love the way they look!  Such a nice change from tinsel.

We love you Zander!

Life

 I feel bad for Porter because I never posted a picture of him at Halloween.  He was the most handsome prince I've ever seen with his make-shift sword and shield. 

We had an awesome Thanksgiving at my parents home, but unfortunately I left the camera at home.  This is Porter's first year with a live tree and he loved tromping through the snow to find the perfect tree to cute down.

 Saturday, December 1st I was at Jenny's house for a sisters' crafting day when Chant called to tell me he had Porter at the ER getting stitches.  He tripped and fell into the corner of our bookcase.  He got 4 1/2 stitches (Dr. counted the double stitch as the half).  I made it back in before he got the stitches, so I was in the room with him holding his hand.  I was shocked because Porter held completely still.  I kid you not, the boy didn't move at all.  His eyes followed the needle as the doctor pulled it up, but that was it.  I was getting a little queasy, but I held my boy's hand and focused on his wrinkly little fingers.  We made it home 45 minutes before the ward Christmas party started.  He wanted to go, so we changed him out of his bloody shirt and off we went.

 I've been a little obsessed lately with hair tutorials.  Finally, I found someone who could explain the waterfall braid to me.  Brinnley is so patient while I watch my videos and then copy what I've seen on her and she is always excited to look in the mirror when I'm done.  She's started to have more of an opinion about her hair and tells me how to do it.  The half waterfall is a new favorite of hers.  I only do it on one side and then finish it off with a normal braid.  I love that she lets me experiment on her.  Ainsley only lets me try new things after I've done it on Brinnley and only if it looks cute.  Love these girls!

I am not alone

Something's been eating at me for a few weeks now.  Three Sundays ago I was asked to share an experience or time in my life when I felt my Savior's love for me in Relief Society.  I was honest and shared two very personal experiences when I knew without a doubt my Savior was with me, carrying me and strengthening me.  But when I sat down I felt an overwhelming sense of sadness.  I had cheated myself and those in the room.  I had shared those same experiences in a talk I gave at Young Women's in Excellence.  Although only three or four people in the room had been in attendance when I had previously shared those experiences, I felt like I had let them down.  I had denied them the opportunity to learn more about me and to let them know that I knew the Savior has touched my live since those experiences have happened.  But I was afraid.  The experience that initially came to mind felt too recent, too raw, too exposing. 

I have been thinking about this a lot, and then I read something on another blog today and this hit me so hard.  Maybe someone else would have benefited from hearing my experience that burned to be told.  Maybe there was someone going through a similar situation that could have related.  Maybe, I would have strengthened a friendship or made a new friendship by letting others see into my soul.  I have been so guarded in the thoughts I express and the way that I interact with others because I am afraid of judgement or being misunderstood.  And the result is I haven't made connections with as many people as I would have liked and those I have made friendships with, I feel I have short-changed.  I'm truly sorry for that, because by not being open myself I may not have allowed others to feel like they could share with me.  Relationships of all kinds require give and take.  I have been happy to take others' stories, but reluctant to give my own.  I didn't want to have this one thing define who I am, but in a way by not talking or letting others see there is more to me, I have let just that happen.  Hopefully I am not the only one who is constantly in need of reevaluating who I am, what my self-worth is.  Or maybe I really am that slow of a learner. 

I still don't quite know my purpose, but I do know this.  I know that my Heavenly Father and my Savior are aware of me.  I have seen miracles in my life, from the seemingly small to the extraordinary and every one of them has softened my heart and reminded me that I am of worth, that I am His daughter and He is aware of me and that my brother and Savior suffered for me, not only for my sins, but for my sorrows as well.  I know that He cries when I cry and His heart hurts when I am hurting.  I feel His love for me.  So even as I struggle with trials I know I am not alone.  And my circle of comfort could be larger, if I would open myself and let others in.  I don't have to carry these burdens on my own.  My Savior helps make the burdens on my back lighter, but that load would be even less if I would let others put their arms around me and help lift me up.  So to those of you who have tried, I thank you for not giving up.  I'm trying to do and be better. 

You Better Not Cry!

Last night we had a wonderful Christmas party at Oma and Opa's house.  Ainsley was so sad to leave and she was crying really hard.  We thought turning on music would help.  It happened to be Justin Bieber's Christmas album.  Porter has that thing memorized.  He was getting really frustrated that Ainsley wouldn't stop crying.  After a couple songs he said, "Turn it to number 4!"  That song is Santa Cluas is Coming to Town.  Porter started singing along and he turned and sang to Ainsley "You better watch out, you better not cry."  But she kept on crying.  Porter, in a very exasperated voice said, "Well that didn't work!"  Chant and I were dying laughing.  Towards the end of the song Ainsley started to calm down and when she finally quit crying Porter threw his fist in the air Rocky Style and said, "Finally!"  Oh he was cracking us up!  Love that little boy!